Anger happens to be a very primal emotion, one that can spell doom to your relationship if you’re not careful and don’t manage to get a handle on that temper of yours. I’m sure that you have been there, spewing off angry curses at innocent bystanders who don’t have a clue on what you’re so angry about. It could be that a crow used your head as a «head» or that your brand new car got totaled and since you don’t have insurance coverage, you’re left holding the bill.
Do you think that the situations listed above are enough to push you off the edge? Frankly, it should, otherwise you’re just not human. Expressing anger is a natural process, so expressing it is not exactly taboo, but the flip side is when you get to expressing so much rage, bottled up anger that you go overboard and then the problem becomes apparent to everyone close to you except yourself. Here are a few handy anger management tips that you can use to bring that temper of yours under control before you end up busting up your relationship for good.
Take a close look at yourself when you’re seeing red
Yep! It’s time to take a closer look at yourself and find out if you have an anger management problem or not. I’m sure that you have cursed all the way from here to Zanzibar, but the question you need to ask yourself is this, «Do you think you have a problem in controlling your anger?» The very fact that you’re questioning yourself just indicates that you do think you have a problem. Do you have the habit of smashing anything you can get your hands on especially when you’re in «the mood»? If that’s the case, yeah, you may as well get prepped to say goodbye to your relationship, unless you’re ready to take the issue seriously. The first step in any anger management class is to overcome the denial mode and admit you have an issue with managing your anger effectively.
Be a fish
Anger is a natural emotion; one that you may direct at the person who offends you or you may opt to keep it bottled up and end up directing all that rage at an innocent bystander or at yourself. The next time you get the urge to start demolishing your furniture along with your relationship, take a moment, relax; sit it out. Just try to relax, breathe in deeply, count to 10 and see if you still have the red glaze over your eyes. Think fish and you’ll get the general idea of the breathing pattern. Usually, this method works well for trivial issues, like crow poo making a fashion statement on your brand new blazer. However this method may not work for all issues especially the big ones out there.
This method works well since you would be using logic to restructure your anger around. Sooner or later, you’ll come to realize that nothing great ever comes out of screaming your head off other than a visit to the doc to get your laryngitis fixed. So, if you’re not in the mood for a doctor’s bill or one from an anger management clinic, you may want to give the «logic over emotion» routine a tryout. The logic over emotion works every time, provided you take the time off to consider this anger management tip.
The next time you feel like force feeding your banker your credit rating file, you may want to take a moment off, see if you can conjure up something funny in your head and usually, within moments of doing so, your anger should dissipate. Granted that there are going to be issues which you will feel strongly about, but there’s no need to fly off the handle just because your bank does not approve your loan. Humor is a sure fire way to get a grip on that temper before you opt to jump start a series of events, one that can be traced back to your anger and your inability to manage the same.
Obviously, for those of you with genuine anger problems, the above is a simple outline as possible action to take. However, if you are serious about really getting away from the”anger habit”, and need more than just anger management tips, then Dr. Tony Fiore’s”Anger Coach Online”is definitely for you.